It’s strange going back to Zebron when Palos isn’t king.
Yeah, it’ll be even stranger seeing Beraeus all grown up.
Well, Beraeus has some big sandals to fill, but if he’s half the man Palos was - the kingdom should be in good shape.
I hope his father taught him how to throw a really extravagant wedding - lots of food - dancing girls -
You think Tarlus will be there?
Who cares?
Uh - Iolaus. I mean, it’s been a long time. Let it go.
After what he did? Never.
Ho! Travellers!
Oh, no.
Repeat customers!
Another Falafel testimonial!
My only testimony is I won’t make the same mistake twice.
You know what? I’m starved.
I - I-i-i-i-i - wouldn’t.
Only one dinar for the best food in Greece!
You mean, for the best greasy food, don’t you?
One dinar?
How can you go wrong? No waiting!
I-magine that.
Goat’s milkshake?
Great! What a deal!
Herc, could you? Thanks.
Another satisfied customer. Tell your friends.
And if you’re interested - there’s still franchises available.
Huh - really?
Oh, um - Herc! You sure you don’t want some of this?
I - no. It’s, uh - hard to believe, isn’t it?
Yeah.
You really don’t need to do this. I can fill my own tub.
Oh, no, Mistress. The king wouldn’t hear of that.
When do you start taking orders from me, and not the king?
After the wedding, Mistress.
Then you can look forward to that day, because this pampering isn’t my style.
But we enjoy it, Mistress.
Uh, well, I don’t. I take care of myself.
Well, whatever suits you, Mistress.
It’d suit me for you to stop calling me Mistress. My name’s Ramina.
Yes, Mistress.
Out of our way! You! Come with us!
Please! No! What are you doing?! Help!
Come on! Move it!
Ooh. Herc -
Uh - you feelin’ OK?
Fine. You look a little pale.
Ooh. Your, uh - your stomach isn’t bothering you at all?
Nope.
What’s wrong? Don’t tell me, fast food doesn’t agree with you?
Fast is OK. I’m just not sure it was food.
Ahh - good King Palos.
My father was a great man.
Beraeus?
Hercules. Iolaus.
You didn’t need to dress up in your battle armor to greet us.
I wish - that were the reason.
Is - something wrong?
Ramina, my bride-to-be, has been kidnapped.
And I swear I’ll bring her back - with the head of the dog who took her.
Any idea - who it was?
Tarlus - the scourge of my kingdom.
Beraeus - wait.
This isn’t Tarlus.
You don’t know him anymore, Hercules.
He’s changed since the days he fought at my father’s side.
But what could he hope to gain by doing something like this?
10,000 dinars ransom.
Now, hold on!
I mean, the more men and weapons you take out there, the more chance for Ramina getting hurt.
And you know Tarlus - those hills are his home.
Well, he’s gonna be in the trees, the grass, the water - you’re not gonna -
I can’t let him get away with this.
You won’t have to - but don’t send an army.
Iolaus and I know all his tricks. We’ll go.
He’s your friend, Hercules. What if you have to fight him?
Or kill him?
You’re our friend, too - as was your father.
What Tarlus did was wrong.
I promise you - we’ll bring Ramina back.
Tear down, men.
Hercules - this is not gonna be easy.
But - better us out here than Beraeus.
At least we don’t want Tarlus’ head.
Speak for yourself.
What is it with you two?
In the battle of Paltros - Tarlus and I were fighting back-to-back - outnumbered.
You know the drill. I look up - he’s gone.
I’m lucky I wasn’t killed. What am I supposed to think?
Well, that’s not Tarlus. I mean, something must have happened.
Yeah? Well, there was a time I wouldn’t have believed he’d kidnapped a woman, either.
Look, all I know is - he left me alone, in the middle of a battle, without telling me why.
That says it all, don’t you think?
Yeah.
Oh! Must have been - tough growing up in this wild country!
Tarlus is lucky he survived.
Well - Primord country. Uh - a little more.
You think we’re gonna run across any?
Hope not. Thanks for your help.
Just don’t reveal yourself too quickly.
What, you mean like - knocking his head off the moment I lay eyes on him?
Exactly.
See what I can do.
I’ve come for the girl! I was sent - by King Beraeus!
Throw down your weapon.
Where’s the money?
Oh-oh, it’s, uh, nearby, butcha don’t get it until I see the girl!
Hello, Tarlus - good to see ya again.
Watch out! Hercules will be with him!
He’s up here!
Let’s go!
Uh - huh - guys, I - I’m sorry, I, uh - I gotta go!
Natros!
What happened!
We’ve been tricked! That’s what happened?! I want Ramina back!
Yeah, but that one doesn’t have her!
He’ll lead us to the one who does!
There he is! Through those trees!
Faster! Don’t lose him!
Hurry!
Where’d he go?!
Stay with him!
Shortcut through the canyon.
You’re slipping, Iolaus.
You’re gonna kill him.
No. No. It’ll take a lot more than this to kill Tarlus.
Yeah - but it’ll be great to see him scramble.
Get back!
Avalanche!
Get out of my way!
Watch out!
Get back!
Run!
It’ll take ‘em hours to get out of there!
- Anyone hurt?! - No!
Tarlus isn’t the kind to give up easily.
Yeah - I know. We better get going.
What?! I just b - ! You c - ! Oh! Hercules!
Uh - let’s go.
Sire, the scouts have returned.
And?
- They lost them. - What?!
They - said it was difficult to track them - without being seen.
Isn’t that what those idiots are paid to do?!
Yes, your Highness.
Dock the head scouts a month’s pay.
Use that as bonus for anyone who picks up the trail. Understand?!
Yes, your Highness.
What are you doing?!
Uh - I’m taking a bath. I’m hot and sticky and feel like a piece of dirt.
Now’s not the time!
If I’m making you nervous, I can go around the bend.
You’re making me nervous!
I mean - uh, I mean - Hercules will be back from scouting any minute.
Then he can wait. I’m not gonna let Beraeus see me like this.
But you look fine!
Maybe you’re used to living like a pig, but I’m not!
But - ooh! Ow! Excuse me.
Wait! Wait! You can’t go alone!
Are you planning to scrub my back?!
- No! I just - ! - Then what possible good would you do?
I could stand guard. We are in Primord country, you know.
Are we?! I’ve been out here for days, and I haven’t seen anything bigger than a squirrel.
Then you’ve been lucky!
Well, if I see a Primord, or a flying turtle, or anything that looks like it doesn’t belong in the water with me - I’ll scream.
You should consider taking a bath yourself, by the way.
She could get a - without taking a breath.
What are you doing?
Uh - I was taking a - just - cooling off.
Oh. Where’s Ramina?
Oh - she’s taking a bath. Huh.
So, uh - find us a good trail?
Uh, yeah. Yeah. It’ll take us a half-day longer, but Tarlus won’t expect it.
Good. Uh - Hercules?
Have you ever noticed whether I - ?
I-I mean, I wasn’t taking a bath - I was just, you know, cooling off, but, uh - do you think I - ?
Oh, never mind.
Yeah. Well, now that you’re - cool, maybe you should go check on Ramina.
Me?
Yeah.
She said around the bend.
No sign of her.
She should be here.
Ramina?!
Ramina!
Iolaus!
I can’t believe it. I heard her splashing around just before you came.
You sure that wasn’t your own little bath?
Even Tarlus couldn’t catch up with us that quick.
Maybe it wasn’t Tarlus.
Primords?
Just because we haven’t seen them doesn’t mean thy aren’t around.
Well, what would they want with Ramina?
I’m not sure I wanna think about that.
Well, they came this way. That’s for sure.
It’s odd - not much of a struggle. You never heard her scream?
No. Maybe they took her by surprise.
Maybe.
Poor Ramina. First she’s grabbed by Tarlus, then the Primords grab her.
Maybe she was born under an unlucky sign.
Speaking of signs - I’d say we’re getting pretty close.
Boy - I hope Tarlus has got her! I don’t want to meet them again!
Oh, no!
Let’s see who warned us.
Are you OK?
My sheep! They took my sheep!
We have to get him some help.
The town is miles away. We can’t afford the time.
We don’t have much choice. He’ll die out here alone.
I’ll be all right!
Yeah - you’ll be all right. Come on, friend.
I’m - sorry, your Highness. The new scouts - didn’t have any better luck.
You told them what their punishment would be if they failed?
Yes, Sire.
A king - shouldn’t go back on his word, should he?
No - Sire.
Slap them in irons.
Ready the rest of my troops.
Sire?
I’m going after Ramina, myself.
But - what about - Hercules?
Do you see him?
I don’t!
The scouts don’t! And I have a wedding coming up with - no bride.
Yes, Sire.
I’ll handle this - the way it should have been handled from the beginning - my way.
This man needs his wounds patched up - and some food and a - place to rest.
Twenty dinar. Friend, for that sort of money, he can have the deed to the place.
I should be out with my flock!
No, no, no, hey. Take it easy. You need rest for now.
My sheep! They’re being eaten raw by those - things!
You’ll have other sheep. You only have one head - you need to take care of it.
Iolaus -
Wait.
I overheard you say that you’re looking for Tarlus.
Yeah?
I’ve seen his camp.
Where?
Do not tell anyone - who told you this.
We won’t. Go on.
Head east out of town until you reach - a grove of apple trees. Turn towards the mountains.
When you reach them - you should see the camp.
Good. Thank you.
Be careful. You two don’t exactly blend in out there.
Right.
Ten dinars - an even split. You made out well.
Tell Tarlus we miss him.
So, how’d you know he was gonna send us the wrong way?
Intuition.
Come on. You’ve seen Tarlus do it before.
That too.
Wait. If the Primords kidnapped Ramina, why are we headin’ toward Tarlus’ camp?
Aah, just a hunch. Tarlus sure went to a lot of trouble to send us in the wrong direction.
Any ideas?
Get - Ramina from Tarlus -
OK -
There’s our man, now.
Ramina!
Are you seeing what I’m seeing?
- These are for you. - They’re gorgeous. Come with me.
Herc - what do we do? Should we interrupt?
No. Let’s wait till they come out.
Come.
I have a surprise.
Wait. Close your eyes.
Now open them.
I know it’s not much.
It’s beautiful.
It was my mother’s. She wore it at her wedding.
It’s so soft - and delicate.
Like you.
I wish I could give you more.
This is perfect.
Besides, I don’t think a long, flowing veil would be appropriate for our little outdoors ceremony.
That’s what I mean. You deserve more - a huge celebration - the finest food and wine.
I’m getting what I want. I’m getting the man I love.
An outlaw.
You didn’t choose that.
Doesn’t matter. You’ll be living the life of a fugitive - maybe dying the death of one.
If it’s by your side - that’ll be enough.
We need to talk to him.
Yeah, but that’s not the Tarlus we knew. He would never have extorted money from the king.
This doesn’t make sense. There has to be more to it.
- We promised Beraeus. - I know.
So, what do we do? Get her anyway?
A promise is a promise.
Tarlus.
No!
- I’m not going back! - What’s going on?!
No, let me go! No!
He-elp!
So much for sneaking out quietly.
Hey, they’ve got Ramina!
Stop!
Damn you! Put me down!
No! Put me down!
Tarlus!
Warn Tarlus! Ramina’s been taken!
You don’t know what you’re doing!
You know where to find us.
Tarlus
Ramina.
You let me go! Put me down!
Let me go!
What?! Do you sharpen those things?!
You can run - or be carried.
But one way or the other - you’re going with us.
Yeah - what he said.
They went this way! They’re in those trees up ahead!
I can’t believe you two are doing this.
Growing up, all I heard about was stories of you two and Tarlus, and how you fought together.
Now I find out you’re not his friends at all.
We made a promise.
- To who? - The king.
Beraeus? He doesn’t know about keeping promises. Ask Tarlus.
We will.
When? After I’m married to Beraeus?
You agreed to the wedding!
Of course, I did! He threatened to burn my ancestral village if I didn’t.
Faking the kidnapping was the only way Tarlus could get me away from him without people being hurt.
You mean, without Tarlus being hurt.
That’s a lie! There’s not a cowardly bone in his body.
Yeah? Could have fooled me.
Hold it! Both of you!
- But - - No - ‘But’ anything, Ramina.
You’ve got to realize how hard it is for us to believe what you’re saying.
We’ve known Beraeus since he was a boy - and his father was as good and decent a king that ever lived.
Even rotten apples fall close to the tree.
OK. We’ll talk to Beraeus - after we take you back.
I promise - no harm will come to you or your village.
Until you’re gone. Then every lie Beraeus tells you will turn into death for my people.
Get behind us.
Get back!
Boy! You fought us a lot harder than you fought those beasts!
They’re not beasts!
Friends?
In the truest sense - not like some people who just call themselves friends.
No wonder Tarlus knows so much about them.
Tarlus is respected out here - because he respects them.
He’s good to people and beasts. Out here, nobody would force a woman to marry them.
I told you - when we’re face-to-face with Beraeus - we’ll settle this.
Yeah - and those friends of yours - hit really hard.
Tarlus - we need to rest.
We have to be close. Whether she’s walking or being carried, we gotta be catching up with them.
Look - we’ll do whatever we have to - to get Ramina back.
But if we keep going like this - we’ll be no good to you when we catch up to them.
Five minutes, Tarlus - that’s all we ask.
I’m sorry.
I can’t go much further.
We’ll stop.
There’s no need to make this difficult.
Just tell us where we can find Tarlus - and, uh, you can go back to, uh - whatever it is - your kind do.
He really - isn’t worth the pain you’ll suffer before you die.
Stupid beasts.
Sire - I don’t think they can talk.
Well, let’s find out!
It’s your last chance.
Once he gets going, it’s - it’s hard for me to stop him.
You really don’t talk, do you?
Well - you’re absolutely no use to me. Yah.
Tarlus! Tarlus! You were right.
They doubled back. But there’s something else you should see.
How could they do this?!
Beraeus.
What is it?
I’m not sure. Wait here.
Ramina -
Iolaus -
- what happened?
Oh - what do you think? I saw something moving in the bushes.
I - where’s Ramina?
Uh - the same place she always is - gone.
Here they are! Get ‘em!
She isn’t here!
Tarlus.
Where’s Ramina?!
You mean, you don’t know?
Stop!
We thought you took her.
This is starting to give me a headache.
Smile, Ramina. Soon you’ll be queen!
It still surprised me that Beraeus turned out this way. I mean, his father -
- wasn’t the man we expected, either.
King Paltros did his best.
He taught his son how to rule, but not how to handle power.
Beraeus didn’t prove to be the man we thought he was.
Well, I guess people change, don’t they, Tarlus?
I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a long time, Iolaus.
I trusted you.
I know. Leaving you at that battle was the most difficult thing I ever had to do.
Then why did you do it?
I can’t tell you. I made a vow.
Are you saying - that after all these years, you can’t talk about it, because you’re - keeping a secret?
A promise.
Who to?
If you can’t talk about it even now - how can I forgive you?
For what I did, I could never expect your forgiveness.
I’ll talk to him.
The wedding will be at daybreak. Start the preparations.
But your Highness - the guests haven’t arrived.
I don’t care about the guests!
You have all night to prepare! Now, move!
Yes, Sire.
Get some rest. I want you looking beautiful for our wedding day.
You can make me marry you - but I’ll never be your wife!
How appealingly naive.
The practical truth is that - you’ll enjoy being married to a king.
Raising heirs to the throne is - so much easier than getting pregnant to some - some peasant!
And having to struggle to feed your dirty - dirty, little children.
A struggle I’d find more pleasureable than spending one night in your bed!
Well, get ready for a life of pain, because - your home will be my bed.
Take her away. Post extra guards.
OK, let’s get this over with.
We are gathered - before the gods on high, to join together Beraeus -
Just get to the final vows.
Oh. Do you, Beraeus - take Ramina as your wife for all time - and swear by Zeus to love and protect her?
Oh, yes.
And do you, Ramina, take - ?
No, I do not. I don’t wanna marry this man.
She does.
Does anyone present have any objections to these two people being joined as man and wife?
In that case, I now pronounce -
Wait! I object!
Hercules - you have no business interrupting.
She doesn’t wanna marry you, Beraeus.
But I’m the king. I have chosen her.
Now, if you could be civil a moment, you can - celebrate with us when we’re done.
A forced marriage - is nothing to celebrate.
You don’t understand. My father wanted me to take a queen.
Not like this, he didn’t.
Oh, I’m sorry you feel that way, but - it really doesn’t matter.
Let her go!
Stop them!
Attack!
Get ‘em!
Ramina!
Tarlus!
Happy landings!
I got your back.
Get down!
And I got yours.
Don’t do this, Beraeus.
King Beraeus.
Being king is - more than a title. I thought your father taught you that.
My father was a weakling! I saw that at the battle of Paltros!
I don’t know what you saw - but keeping Tarlus and Ramina from marrying can’t change it.
If I can’t have her - no one will!
It’s all right.
Beraeus - I - I’m sorry it had to turn out like this.
Maybe I was - never meant to be a king.
The end of the house of Palos.
And the end of what I’ve been carrying around all thoese years.
There was a reason I left your back unguarded at the battle of Paltros.
I saw my king - Palos - on his knees - begging for his life - and the life of his wife and son beside him.
I had no choice but to leave your side and save them.
Why didn’t you tell me this before?
Palos was humiliated. He made me promise never to tell anyone - not even you.
But Beraeus knew - and he couldn’t stand your knowing.
That’s how I became an outlawr in my own land.
I’m sorry.
If I’d known at the time that I had made the wrong choice -
No - you made the right choice.
We were both fighting for the king. You - did your duty.
How do I look?
Like you’re about to pass out.
That’s because I am. Where is she?
Relax. It’s her wedding day.
You - look - beautiful.
Thank you.
We are gathered together before the gods on high, to join together Tarlus and Ramina in the bond of marriage.
They make a great couple, don’t they?
Yes - they do.
You know? We should come to Zebran more often - only - they oughtta get some more dancing girls.
We do.
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
Yes! Marvelous!