Oh, glorious Hera.
I must possess the beautiful Penelope.
Please - send me some sign.
I will do anything to win her -
anything.
Thank you, great Hera.
Now you must show me - who must I kill?
Soldier! Where you headed?
Nespa.
I’m going there, myself - to a wedding. Let me give you a hand.
I’m not trying to steal your armor.
Don’t touch it!
I’m just trying to help.
I don’t want your help.
Two sets of armor - your comrade’s.
He died because - I was a coward.
I’m taking his armor back to his family.
You still have a long ways to go.
It’s the least I can do.
I understand.
Good luck, my friend.
Beat that.
Dead center.
OK?
Go!
Why do we bother practicing? Even if we win an event, the groom gets the money.
I take pride in knowing I’m as good as any of them.
Then why aren’t you sitting at the main table - instead of quarantined - half-way to the woods?
Still - not many people would dare invite a centaur to a wedding.
Ten years we worked for the bride’s father.
And this is the thanks we get?!
A table between the children and where they tether their beasts?!
Aww - are you denying the beast in you?
You watch your tongue.
Craesus is right, Lyla.
You’d probably be a bridesmaid if you didn’t hang around with us.
I choose my own friends.
Lyla!
Fill it with wine. And when the time is right, add this!
Hera has given me the power to win the hand of Penelope.
Penelope? She’s the bride!
Now I can show her the error of her judgment.
And with this - I will avenge my brother’s death!
It’s a club like you’ve never seen.
This club will kill Hercules.
Hercules?!
- Hey, Hercules! Wait up! - Not again.
Hercules! I thought it was you!
Salmoneus - good to see you.
You got quite a stride, there.
You should take better care of yourself.
You’re looking a little warn down since the last time I saw you.
Yeah-heah-heah. Hey, that’s not funny, my friend.
It might be easy for a god to entertain fifty nubile maidens.
It almost killed me.
Almost, huh?
Still selling togas?
Nah, I got out of that racket - style change every year.
Real estate! That’s where the future is.
They’re not making any more land, you know?
Which reminds me - hey! Take a look at this.
Isn’t that beautiful?
I got a great deal on some swampland in Macedonia.
Not interested.
No, I don’t mean for you to buy! You could be my partner, huh?!
With your knack for moving mountains and diverting rivers, we could make a killing just subdividing by twenty extra lots.
Not - interested.
Think about it! You don’t have to decide now!
Hey, Hercules, where you going?!
You’re - going to Nespa, too.
Yeah! There’s a wedding going on there.
I figure that newlyweds always need to get off on the right foot.
Buy a home, a little land. See, you got your southern exposure - three kinds of...
Happy?
- and you?
- very. But I still think it was a mistake inviting Lyla and the centaurs.
Marcus - we’ve been over this. Lyla is one of my oldest friends.
And Craesus and Deric have worked my father’s farm for years.
It’d be an insult not to invite them.
Even at the risk of destroying the wedding ceremony?
They’ll be fine - at least as long as they stay away from the wine.
Mmm - who’s gonna keep them away?
Location, location, location. That’s what it’s all about!
See - I’ve got some Thracian hills here with views to die for.
Not - interested.
No - you don’t realize the potential - whoa! Look at all these prospects!
Ah, guests.
I can’t believe your ability to turn anything into a profit-making venture.
It’s a gift.
Do me a favor? Keep the hustling a selling to a minimum?
They may be dressed for a wedding, but these are not rich people.
You hurt me.
Don’t tell me I’ve actually wounded your pride.
What pride?! You’re cutting off my source of revenue!
I’m trying to earn a living, here!
Hercules!
Penelope!
Oh, Penelope, look - look at you. You’re all grown up.
Look - I couldn’t stay twelve forever - not even for you.
I’m so happy to see you. I wasn’t sure you’d come.
What - miss the wedding of Myceum’s sister?
I wish he were here to see it.
I know - me too. This is a friend of mine - Salmoneus.
Congratulations. I’d like to talk to you about your future.
Do you - listen to a word I say?
Which word is that?
Come - you must be starving after your journey.
Hi! Uh - I’m Salmoneus...
Now - tell me all about your adventures.
Look at that!
Two hundred four paces!
Ever seen anyone throw that far?
Only once.
Oh - how about that far, with accuracy?
Pick your target.
The far stump.
You’re on.
OK! I’ve got Hercules for twenty dinars! Twenty dinars!
Who’ll take the centaurs?! Twenty dinars!
Bet against Hercules? Are you crazy?
I’ll give two-to-one odds.
Three-to-one. Five?
OK, at five-to-one, that’s - let me see - ten dinars pays fifty - less...
Be my guest.
That’ll be hard to beat.
Very hard.
It’s a little light. Makes it harder to gauge the distance.
Well, perhaps you’d rather -
Yeah! Yeah!
- It went clear through it! - He hit the centaur’s spear!
OK! That’s five for you! Nothing for you.
Lucky shot.
You can’t lose with honest Salmoneus!
Hey, Hercules! You ever thought about getting an agent?!
What’s an agent?
You know, someone to find you work.
Make sure you get paid for all your toil and trouble?
It’s not work to me, Salmoneus. I enjoy helping people.
And besides, payment is never part of the deal.
See, that’s why you need me! I could get you a contract for big dinars!
Not interested.
I’m just thinking of your future.
Suppose you wanna get out of the hero business - you know - open up a souvenir shop - have - I know - not interested.
I bet I know what interests you.
And - what’s that?
Pretty things?
Come - I’ll show you the best view in all of Nespa.
Well, come on. I won’t bite.
Did I lie?
No - it must be wonderful to wake up every morning and - see this.
Hmm - I have never seen a man throw a javelin so far.
Well - all it takes is a - little practice.
What else have you practiced?
Can we - slow this down?
Well, don’t tell me you like to fall in love with someone before you go to bed with them.
I’m not a virgin, you know?
That’s not the point.
I just - don’t - want to go through life - leaving a string of fatherless children behind.
Are you always so noble?
I try to be.
Well - a toast - to Hercules and nobility.
And to Lyla - and beauty.
Are you sure I can’t convince you otherwise?
Ah - I’m sorry.
No.
Look - I can’t - do this.
Well, you can’t expect me to make it easy for you - no offense.
Uh - none taken.
Excuse me.
Tell me, Salmoneus - do I look all right to you?
Uh - sure, I think you’re very attractive.
I mean, I don’t find you particularly attractive - but I’m sure women do.
I mean, I don’t find you unattractive.
In fact, I consider you quite handsome.
I don’t want you to get the wrong idea!
I’m not interested in you that way.
What I meant was - Do I look like there’s anything wrong with me?
Come again?
I just don’t - fell right. It’s - my eyes.
Does the day seem - a bit overcast to you?
Not at all. Why do you ask?
Just - curious
I think it’s disgusting that they should ask those creatures - to a wedding, no less!
He’ll hear you.
Quiet down. Quiet down.
Funny - I thought the chicken was delicious.
You think it’s the company?
It’s - possible. You see - assigned seating can be a problem.
Yes, uh - I’ve noticed these centaurs have been - exiled to the far tables.
Well, some would claim that they offer a better view of the ceremonies.
Well, in that case, perhaps you’d care to eat with us.
I’d love to. It’s been years since I’ve broken bread with a centaur.
It’s rumored you were taught by one.
No rumor - almost everything I know, I learned from a centaur named Ceridian.
- Including athletic skills? - Yes.
Perhaps you oughtta test a student - see how well he’s learned.
Done.
Two fingers - left of center!
Great shot, Deric! Hercules won’t beat that!
Two fingers - right of center! A tie!
Two winners!
- I want my money back! - Well done.
Yeah, give us our stakes back!
Why not leave it with me, huh?! I’ll give great odds! I’ll double the odds!
I’m not - laying back. Something is wrong with my eyes.
Yeah, right! You hit a bull’s-eye two hundred paces away, huh?
You must be going blind, huh?!
Salmoneus, I’m telling you, I can’t -
You know, whatever you’re doing, keep it up!
If this keeps going, I get the odds down to three - maybe even two - to-one - huh?!
You gave him the drink?
Just like Nemis said.
All of it?
What do you think I am - stupid?!
Anybody else would’ve been completely incapacitated.
Nemis is too crazy to care.
You’d be crazy too, if Nemis killed your twin.
Nemis’ twin tried to rape Hercules’ wife. He deserved to die.
Too bad you wound up on the same side as Nemis, huh?
And the rest of us outcasts!
Watch your mouth, Craesus!
Sharos makes a beautiful maid of honor, doesn’t she?
Pity she’s spoken for.
Oh, maybe I am losing my touch.
Oh, but you didn’t have any problems yesterday.
Penelope?
How well do you know Lyla?
Oh! The lovely Lyla! We used to be best friends.
When we were younger, we were inseperable.
She had a real crush on my brother before he died at the siege of Corinth.
And then she changed. She got - wilder - started hanging around with centaurs.
Well - it’s not a crime.
Oh, it is to some people around here.
You - might have lost a few fans when you befriended Deric, earlier.
I didn’t befriend him; I was just being civil.
Yeah - I try to be the same way.
Centaurs are like everyone else. Some are good; some are bad.
Oh, no - speaking of bad.
Nemis.
Where’re you going?! Take it easy, Centaur!
- You know him? - You clumsy lout!
His twin brother tried to abduct someone very dear to me.
I was forced to kill him. What’s he doing here?
I suppose he invited himself.
He used to work our farm.
We even played together when I was younger.
Then my father threw him off when he started getting too familiar.
Your father had the right idea.
Marcus, don’t.
I don’t want him here. He wasn’t invited.
Please? Don’t make a scene.
Everyone ready?
Nemis - are you sure you wanna go through with this?
Have you chosen your prize?
Oh, yes - I have.
Stop it. No, Marcus.
No, listen. No, come on - it’s our wedding day - please?
Don’t ask me to leave.
Don’t be afraid. He’ll go before long.
Some day, Penelope will thank me for this.
Hey, look! It’s Tiron!
It’s our brother’s armor.
Where is he, Tiron?
He died in battle - at my side. It was my fault.
Tiron! Tiron, you’re back!
Please, Sharos. I don’t deserve you - not anymore.
I’ll second that!
Tell us how our brother died, war-hero!
It was in the marshes - at Thebes.
We were attacked by a larger force.
I fell. I was about to be killed.
Taros turned his back to help.
He died saving me.
Did you avenge his death?!
I tried - but the command to retreat was sounded!
So you ran?!
I withdrew! A soldier follows orders!
Taros was already dead. There was nothing I could do.
Then I’ll avenge my brother, and you shall join him!
No!
Hold on! Hold on
It’s not your business, Hercules!
Killing him won’t bring your brother back.
But it’ll make us feel better!
Why? Tiron has acted with honor.
He’s carried your brother’s armor from the battlefield to your doorstep.
So, we’ll return the favor! We will deliver his armor to his family!
Then you’ll have to go through me.
It needs salt.
Not a bad payday. I’m surprised that first guy caught you with a sucker-punch.
You could’ve warned me.
I thought you saw it coming.
I’m not seeing much of anything lately, Salmoneus.
The guy was as big as a house. I mean, how could you miss him?
That’s what I’m trying to tell you.
I think I’m going blind.
Salmoneus, what’s going on?
The centaurs smashed the banquet table, and they’re beating up the guests!
Penelope!
Hey! They grabbed the bride - they’re heading this way!
Help! Somebody, help me!
All I can see is shadows.
Let me go!
Watch out!
No!
Lyla! Come on!
Let’s go!
Hercules?
He’s breathing. Don’t drown him!
Oh - thank the gods he’s alive!
What happened?
They took them; they’re gone.
Who?
The centaurs and that slut, Lyla!
No - who’d they take?
Penelope and Sharos.
Marcus - Tiron - you know the land. You lead the way.
Salmoneus, you’re coming, too.
Hercules - you know I’m not much of a warrior.
Salmoneus - I need you - to be my eyes.
All right, all right.
I see what you mean.
Lower your head.
Did you see who it was?
Uh - I couldn’t tell.
Let’s move deeper into the bush.
We’ll be all right if we don’t give ‘em a clear shot.
Lyla! Some food for our guests.
Don’t do this, Nemis. It can only end badly for you.
It’ll end badly, all right. But for Hercules - not me.
He’s done nothing to you!
He killed my brother!
And a day doesn’t pass that I don’t dream of revenge!
Maybe - maybe when he’s dead by my hand, you’ll see me in a different light.
You’re fooling yourself. I could never care for you - not that way.
You loved me once - long ago.
You mistake a child’s affection for something else.
You’re the one that’s mistaken - and the dead carcass of Hercules will prove it to you!
Craesus.
We’ll have our fun later.
Never, pig!
Horse, my dear - horse!
Lyla - how can yo be a part of this? You were my friend.
Right - such a good friend that I’m not even part of the bridal party.
I didn’t think you cared. You haven’t spoken to me in two years.
So? I’ve made new friends.
And I don’t begrudge you that. But old friends still talk.
Is your vision any better?
I can barely distinguish between dark and light.
Maybe it’s just temporary.
What if it isn’t?! I’ve dedicated my life to helping people.
How do I do that if I’m the one that needs help?
Maybe it’s time to hang up the old sandals, hmm?
You’ve done a lot of good deeds.
Time to slow down and smell the roses.
You only go around once, you know?
Well, maybe if you’re immortal, you get a chance to go around and around.
I am not immortal - at least, I don’t think so.
I guess you’ll find out sooner or later. It’s Marcus.
What did you find?
They’ve rejoined forces - headed toward higher ground.
No attempt to cover their tracks.
None - it’s, it’s like they want us to find them.
Hercules! Over here!
The centaurs - they’re out in the open, two hundred paces up the hill - by the caves.
The caves - what are they up to?
We seem to be just out of their range.
Not mine. Salmoneus! I’ll need your help.
What if they get lucky?
Stay behind me. How far?
Two hundred and twenty paces.
What’re you doing?!
He can’t see! Now, where were we?
Is my direction right?
Yeah.
How did we do?
Ah - ten paces to the left - and they’ve moved ten paces to the right.
Hercules! We better get out of here!
They’re about to dislodge a boulder the size of Mt. Olympus!
Tell me how close my last arrow was, then run for the woods.
It’s heading straight for us!
- How close?! - Three paces left!
Marcus, get back!
Who?
Tiron - he saved Marcus’ life.
And mine.
My leg!
Centaurs.
One’s dead - and the others are gone!
Well, at least that cuts the odds.
Marcus - you can’t do any good here. Salmoneus’ll have to take you back.
And leave you?! You can’t fight them alone!
It will be dark in a few hours. Then we’ll be on equal ground.
It’s suicide if you stay here! Come back with us; we’ll get more recruits!
No - I should’ve realized it before - this is between Nemis and me.
Hercules, you can’t!
This is my fight!
But first - I must give a brave soldier a proper burial.
Rest easy, Tiron. You were never a coward.
I know you’re there, Nemis! What are you waiting for?!
Show yourself, Nemis. Or are you afraid?
I’m not afraid - nor am I Nemis.
So - he sent you to do his dirty work.
Yes - but I’m refusing.
Why would you do that?
You’re not my enemy. Even if you were, I wouldn’t take advantage of your blindness.
How do you know I’m blind?
I told him. You’ll be glad to know it’s a temporary condition -
providing, of course, you can make it through the next few days.
You won’t fight against me. Will you fight with me?
Not against Nemis. He raised me.
I respect that - and your refusal to take sides. But will Nemis?
It doesn’t matter. We’re leaving this land. Maybe the Athenians will be more hospitable.
Hide Hercules - till your sight returns. You’re no match for him, now.
I’m afraid there’re two women - who wouldn’t appreciate the wait.
Forget them, and worry about yourself. Hera has given Nemis a special club.
Hera - I should’ve guessed.
The sounds of the bats - they’re from the cave.
You’re very perceptive. They’ll return an hour before dawn.
Hercules? I’m sorry one of you has to die.
Nemis wasn’t always bad. Life - death - wore him down.
Nemis? Please? Let us go.
And I promise, no harm will come to you.
Sweet Penelope - I think I’m the only one here in position to make promises.
And I promise you by - the end of the day, Hercules will be dead.
And you?
Mmm - will start learning to like my stew.
What am I doing here?
Her - cules.
Penelope - show me where you’re tied.
What’s wrong? Can’t you see?
No - hurry! There’s no time to waste!
Uh, uh - the, the key. It’s on the beam, by Sharos.
Uh - six - maybe seven paces to the right.
Here - above my head.
Hurry, please!
Leaving so soon?
Let the women go, Nemis. It’s me you want.
Wrong! I want you and Penelope.
Help! Quick! Undo the chains!
And I’m in no hurry.
I want both pleasures to be slow - and - gratifying.
What is that stench? Dog meat?
Why doesn’t anyone like my cooking?!
Where are the keys?!
I can’t undo it!
It’s opening! Pull! Get my ankle!
No fire - no light.
Now you have the same problem I do.
Except your darkness is about to become - permanent.
Leave me! Save yourself!
I’m not leaving without you!
Hercules!
Plea-ease!
Noooooo!
Nemis!
You killed me.
Save me!
Go! Help Penelope! Help Penelope!
Hercules. I couldn’t undo it! This one’s got two!
Oh, Hercules - break it!
Run! Get out!
Go, save yourself! Go!
Penelope!
I was worried you wouldn’t make it.
Salmoneus?
You were the decoy.
I’m sending you my tailoring bill.
When Marcus wouldn’t let me take him back - I thought it was the least I could do.
You did well. Everybody did - even Nemis.
He really loved you, Penelope.
I know. I’m just sorry love took him so far astray.
When a soldier dies bravely - his sword becomes the symbol of his courage.
I know he’d want you to have it.
Thank you.
Thank you, Hercules - for everything.
It turned out to be a very nice ceremony.
I wish you both the best.
Please come back soon.
You made out quite well, I understand.
Well, I don’t wanna brag, but, uh - I got great odds on you against the centaurs.
Nobody had faith in you like I did.
Hmm - may I - see?
Um - OK? But, uh - don’t drop anything.
Did I ever finish explaining about the custom in these parts?
Uh, uh, uh, wha- wha- what custom is that?
The - bride and groom collect all gambling winnings.
Hercules!
Come on, Salmoneus.
Th - that’s my money back there!
Yes, that was very generous of you.
Generous?! Yeah, but that, but that, but that - !
And smart - they’ll never forget you.
Really? That’s nice!